Written By Rev Laurie Idahosa
Have you found yourself at that stage in life’s journey where you are looking for the special someone to share your future with? We have imaginations and dreams of the kind of spectacular, romantic, loyal, intensely perfect marriage we want to have. For most of us, top on the list is “DRAMA FREE!” We don’t want stress in our marital homes. We want to marry someone who shares in our goals, laughs at our jokes and who makes our home a place we always anticipate; coming back to after a long day at work. We don’t want to mistakenly make a poor choice. Most of us don’t want to jump from one relationship to the next, leaving a trail of broken hearts and mismanaged friendships along our pathway to finding a spouse.
Too often during the process of searching, we don’t get it right. Because we don’t have a clear vision of what we are looking for, we damage friendships that we could have had for a lifetime.
So, if you haven’t bought a ring for that special someone or made a commitment to his/her family, I’d like you to take a moment and consider what I have to say. I would like to make a case for CFites. I believe that an alumnus of CFI has all the characteristics in him/her to be an excellent spouse. In fact, when you are going on that first, fact-finding date with someone, a pertinent question should be, “When you were in school, what unit in CFI did you serve in? If they answer you well… then, you can give them a chance.
Cfites make the best spouses because they have developed the attributes of the kind of spouse that can make your family life heaven on earth. You should always look into the core values of an organization or person that you wish to commit yourself to. What makes them tick? What are the values they hold dear? What are the “non-negotiables” in their life? Research the components of that person’s psyche that you can bank on in the future.
Here are some of the Core Values of CFI that are imbibed by every CFite. These values make them an excellent choice when searching for a life partner:
- They are CREATIVE. Nobody wants a boring, routine-only spouse. We want to be married to someone who consistently brings some excitement to our lives. CFItes know how to manage their talents and have unequivocal skill / aptitude. They are tactful in their dealings with people and are highly intelligent.
- They understand FRIENDSHIP. We all want our spouses to be our lifelong best friend. A CFite has the requisite skills to stay your best friend forever. They imbibe the values of teamwork, they know how to appropriately trust and be trusted. They are warm and caring. They have a sense of humility that makes them great partners in life. No matter how wealthy you eventually become, they’ll always know that they didn’t get there except by the grace of God. They have integrity in their dealings and can be trusted to always be honest. In all that they wear, say and do, they are decent and modest.
- They are full of POSSIBILITY: We want to marry a visionary spouse. Having someone by your side that is always progressive will make you a better person. CFites are innovative and achievement-oriented. They have realistic goals and work diligently to achieve those goals. They are also highly optimistic, which gives you something to smile about in your day to day interactions with them.
- They are REAL. There is nothing worse than being with someone who is always putting up pretenses. We want to be married to someone who accepts us with our flaws and loves us as we are. This doesn’t mean that they don’t wish that we will be better, but, they don’t judge our place on the journey. Cfites are down to earth. They don’t form or pretend to be what they are not. It is refreshing to be with real people.
- They are SPIRITUALLY FERVENT. We need to know when we are married that when the going gets tough, that our spouse will know what to do and will be loyal for the long-haul. CFites are well grounded in the word of God. They don’t get swayed by funny doctrines. You won’t wake up one morning to find that your spouse is doing weird spiritual things. CFites know Gods’ word for themselves and apply it. They also have a strong prayer life and live a lifestyle of worship. Anyone who can worship God with sincerity makes a great lover!
These five points are just a few characteristics amongst the myriads of qualities that make a CFite a suitable candidate for marriage.
While these are some good things to look out for, the truth is, you must follow the leading and guidance of the Holy Spirit when you are choosing a life partner. It is not something that you enter into carelessly or without knowing that you are being led by the Spirit of God. Draw close to God in order to ensure that your decisions are in alignment with His plan for your life. John 10:27 says, “My sheep listen to my voice; I know them and they follow me.” He is always speaking at every juncture along the way. Our challenge is: are we hearing Him? God’s plan for you wont hurt you. Jeremiah 29:11 says, “For I know the plans I have for you says the Lord. They are plans for good and not disaster, to give you a future and a hope.” When we align our heart desires with God’s plans, we can never go wrong.
My prayer for you is that you will find a love that will last a lifetime and that your marital home will be filled with joy all the days of your life, In Jesus Name. If you are marrying a CFite, let us know, we can help you convince your future in laws when you go for your introduction.